I was wondering if I'd be able to stand it much longer if he stayed around.”“I think I'm learning what you mean,” I quietly admitted to him. “It seems the more into Brown Ainsely gets, the nastier he is to me. I really have tried though. For the moment, the problem seems to be taking care of itself. He's ticked off at her for something so I don't think they're even talking. I hate to see her so sad, but that's probably for the best. I'd hate to wind up like you two with that last guy.”“I think it's time for something a little more potent, gents,” Richard announced as he ordered a gin and tonic from the giggly waitress standing by.Mike ordered the same, but I tried to decline. “We've been drinking beer for a couple of hours now. Not so sure switching would be such a good idea.”“C'mon man, you only live once, and Ainsely ain't home anyway, right?” he nudged Mike. I gave in and ordered a bourbon and water. Richard told the waitress to make them all doubles. Was he trying to get us. "Oh okay, I just feel like I gave up everything thing for Allen. I feel lost in his life."I had never thought about Jeremy's life. I guess the truth was I had always judged him by some other standard. I mean his life seemed fine to me. I couldn't understand him, so I couldn't really understand how he felt."So do you want your own art studio?" I asked."I could never make enough money with an art gallery and studio. I just don't have that kind of talent. Not the kind to draw customers two hundred miles." So do you think in you were back living in a metropolis with a gallery you could make a go of it?" I asked."I will never know, will I?" Jeremy asked."Jeremy you probably don't want to hear this, but I'm going to say it anyway. You are very talented, but you are lazy. You are lazy, so instead of saying I'm lazy you are saying I gave up everything for the man I love. Now if you want to be an artist, you all you need is a pencil and paper. You are still an artist no matter where you live.
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